Why won't this pain just go away?

I'm having one of those days. It's difficult to explain,

if your not going through the same thing.

Have you ever been on a holiday when your away from your friends,

your comforts, sometimes your family?

You would usually be away for lets say,

2 weeks, a month?

Well after around 4 days you get used to being away.

But around a week and a half in, you have one of those days,

where you would give ANYTHING to just be with your friends,

in a space your comfortable with.

For me that would be with the people I love,

in, what I like to call, a 'nest', watching movies,

and just laughing.

Well when you go away for a month tops,

think about being away for 4 months,

with 2 more to go.

It's a long time.

And I thought it had gone quite fast,

and was all excited as I have a few days less than 2 months to go,

but it is still a very long time.

Thats my day today.

I know what your thinking,

'Oh God, not again, her whole trip she's been complaining,

she never enjoyed herself!' So on so forth.

Well actually I have enjoyed myself.

I had an amazing time at summer camp,

and with my cousins,

and at the flea market,

during the school play practises and performances,

and in my dance classes.

I just haven't written about it much.

But today is not a fun day.

It's not like anythings changed,

everything is still the same,

and I had a wonderful weekend.

I just miss home.

More than usual.

I've missed my first formal.

I've missed many of my best friends birthdays,

I've missed parties,

I've missed cheering people up when their sad,

I've missed break ups, hook ups, people dating,

but most of all, I have just missed home.

I had a dream last night that my sisters and I were planning a party,

nothing special, but I was so happy, I was with my sisters.

I woke up and thought I was in my own bed, in my house,

in Lane Cove, New South Wales, Australia.

But when I opened my eyes, I saw blinds on the window,

and I realised I don't have blinds on my windows,

and I was not in that place.

I was still here.

In Nancy's bed, in Nancy's house,

in Fullerton, California, The United States of America.

And on top of all this, I just can't seem to sleep at night,

I'll go to bed early, I'll set my alarm, but instead of sleeping,

I will lie in my bed, staring at the ceiling, or pretend to sleep,

or do anything possible to sleep, but I'm not actually sleeping.

Which means when I hear my alarm and I haven't slept,

but I'm SO FREAKING TIRED, I decide to go to a half day of school.

and then I get yelled at.

IT DOENS'T COUNT HERE. AND I NEED SLEEP!

So just lay off. Thanks.

Well I hope this feeling goes away soon.

Until it does, I have,

One Month, Three Weeks, and 3 Days til I leave America,

and

One Month, Three Weeks, and 5 Days til i land in Australia.