and how many people does it take to change a light bulb at...
Scotts - two.
One to mix the martinis and one to phone the electrician.
PLC - one.
She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.
Sydney Grammar - two.
one to change the bulb and one to crack under the pressure
Loretto Kirribilli - one.
She'll put through a call to maintenance staff because there's no way she's goingto do manual labour.
Kings - two.
one to change the globe faster than anyone in the GPS and one to show him around the school afterwards.
Knox Grammar - two.
one to install the new bulb completely powered by testosterone and one to brag about it loudly
Ravenswood - five.
one to change the bulb, two to reassure her that she doesn't look fat at the top of the ladder and two to circulate photos showing that she does.
Abbotsleigh - four.
one to smash the glass ceiling so that they can get to the top of the ladder, one to install the globe and two to check that it's brighter than PLC's
Shore - sixteen.
one to send out the invitations, two to get the beer, one to change the bulb, one to buy ralph lauren polos for everyone, two to smuggle the chicks in and one to keep watch for the boarding master. the second eight just need to be ready to back them up
Macdonald College - five.
one to change the globe and four to do an interpretive dance about it.
Newington. - none.
they're all too drunk to notice.
Killara High - two.
one to change the bulb and one to write to the north shore times about how she did it as well as any private school student.
Sydney Boys High - two.
one to try change the bulb and choke, the other to throw the success party regardless.
Parramatta High - none.
that hole looks better in the dark.
Joey's - fifteen.
it's not that one's not smart enough, it's just that they're a team and they have to form a lineout and get the backs into position.
Barker College - fifteen.
one to change it and the rest to walk around as if they own the place and talk it up.
Sydney Uni - seventy six.
one to change the globe. fifty to protest the globe's right not to change and twenty five to stage a counter protest.
Trinity - none.
those poor bastards are keeping their backs to the wall even if it means standing in the dark.
SCECGS Redlands - sixty one.
one to change the lightbulb and the other sixty to go on a treasure hunt and steal street signs to celebrate.
Queenwood - depends.
could be one, could be ten, no-one is prepared to commit unless the Shore boys are definitely going to be there.
Wenona - two.
to go to the bus stop and flirt with a shore/alo's boy so he'll come and change it for them.
Mercy College - five.
one to screw it in, two to laugh about the word screw and two to message the St Pius boys about it
Riverview - five.
one to change it, and four to go to gowings for new flannellette shirts to wear for the occasion
The International School - none.
they brought notes from their guardians excusing them.
Glenaeon - the entire school.
one to remove the perfectly good globe, two to work out how to dispose of it so that it's dolphin safe, one to replace it with candles and the rest to sit on mats and express how they feel about the change.
North Sydney Girl's High - one.
and she was determined to get better results than the north sydney boys.
North Sydney Boy's High - none.
they didn't have to, the North Sydney Girls insisted on showing them how it was done.
The Conservatorium - forty three.
one to change the globe and a 42 piece orchestra to accompany him changing it and twenty five to stage
No comments:
Post a Comment